The Origin of a Hero

By day he is mild-mannered James Scott*; By night he is...

SAW-MAN!

Rocketed to Earth from the Planet Dipshit, infant James Scott almost met his untimely demise when he crash landed on the Scott Family farm. A near fatal encounter with a radioactive band saw left him with some extraordinary new abilities, increased in strength by Family Guy quotes, baseball and football games, and Hot Pockets.

Raised in a very strict household, young James was brought up under the watchful eye of Ma and Pa Scott. Pa Scott was a police officer and thus, Saw-Man was raised to believe that everyone was a "bad guy". This left him in a world surrounded by potential enemies.

Saw-Man has only one weakness. Upon his arrival to earth, the sun began to drain him of all common sense he was born with. While the sun is beneficial to normal Earthlings, this was not entirely true for Saw-Man. As a result of his alien biological make-up, common sense is to Saw-Man as Kryptonite is to Superman. This single weakness has been the root of most of his problems, and will ultimately lead to his downfall.

Each morning, Ma Scott dresses him to the hilt in his work uniform, spanks his bottom and sends him on his way. Armed only with his lunchbox and Ma Scott's personal radio, he sets out to face the world. He maintains some semblance of normalcy by masquerading as a band saw operator at R&H Machine. He spends his days battling the evils of the band saw, such as cutting angles, keeping material straight in the vise, and low coolant levels. These seemingly mundane tasks help keep our hero ready both mentally and physically for the many perils that will surely await him as the almighty Saw-Man.

At night, after fighting the evils of the day, James Scott dons his other uniform and sets out to face a far greater set of evils. In his short time as the almighty Saw-Man, he has already faced a surprising number of fierce adversaries. These have ranged from the lowly villain SetScrew all the way to megalomaniacal billionaire Lex Cooper. So far, none have been able to conquer the almighty Saw-Man though many have tried.

It would appear that Saw-Man is ready for the world, but is the world ready for the Saw-Man?

To be continued...

* Name changed to protect the innocent.